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Saturday, March 30, 2013

Shown on Kawaii International again....

Last night I got this e-mail in my inbox...

And I'm sitting here like hhhhhhhh are you serious???

I freaked out because they took my picture and showed it around Tokyo! My picture that I felt was so badly coordinated (couldn't they just get a new one? bloo ; o;)

But of course it was a good freak-out~ I wasn't mad or anything xD;

I'm really disappointed though.. I wish they told me -before- it first aired :c I didn't even know that was going on and because of my work schedule, I ended up completely missing all the airings...

I had friends who told me that some shopgirl said something really sweet about me, and that I'd cry when I would see it. But of course at the moment that's not happening...

I tried contacting the team to see if they could let me see it somehow but, did anyone catch it???? What did they say about me? Did anyone record it and re-upload it?

; w; I'm like dying here...

Thursday, March 28, 2013

I won another giveaway!

I've been having a bit of luck these past few months, having won a couple of things from blogs/tumblrs and of course the Kawaii Int'l thing~ and now I won yet another prize! It's something that I've been whining to myself over so I'm very glad I won it. ♥

The giveaway this time was hosted by Christine de la Creme. Thanks girl ; w; I'm really happy (sorry that I didn't reply to your last e-mail! I've been caught up on work..)

PINK earbuds~ I forget that they tend to have these little random items like earbuds and even telephones xD I'll definitely use this once my current ones burn out on me~

And then finally, my long lost love, another Victoria's Secret bag xD This was one of their promotional items from a few weeks ago, where you had to spend like 65-75 dollars as usual. I wasn't in any position to try and get it, nor did they have too many interesting things to buy, so I missed out on it. But then I kept seeing some chicks walking around the city with it... :c I was craving it after seeing just how big it is.

I'm so glad I was able to win it! It's about as tall as my old tote bag, but this one can hold much more and I'm so looking forward to using this xD Christine's giveaway had a 'travel' theme and I will most definitely use this when I'll be going back to Guyana this summer... ♥
Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Gigi in NYC~

Two weeks ago my girl Gigi from North Carolina came up to NYC for the weekend~ Even though I was packed with work and church stuff, I managed to squeeze a bit of time to hang out with her and some other girls.

My outfit for the night. Since I was coming right out of work and then running to meet people, I didn't have much choice as far as dressing up. I just got my favorite tights and a black cowl-neck OP and work it with leggings and my black work sneakers. I didn't want to bring my boots with me since it'd be a lot to carry. Plus my knee's been acting worse.. you can kind of see my food-pregs tummy here xD blah

Makeup shot.

I ran into Gigi and another local gal Malia on St Mark's where we were supposed to meet and eat dinner at. It totally skipped my mind that it was St. Patrick's Day weekend and of course all the places in the city were going to be booked up.. and that people on St. Mark's were going to act dumb.

Since a lot of the places were booked till late (and I was on-call for Yokocho) we roamed around for a bit~ went to Search & Destroy, where Mei later met up with us, and then we were sitting and chilling in 8Bit&Up until it was closer to the time we would hopefully get seated.

A couple of pictures once we got settled in Village Yokocho~

Me and Mei. The lighting in there was really dim so my pictures weren't coming out too well. Mei's phone + camera apps made us look light as hell though LOL not posting those xD

Mei and Gigi.


We were obviously hungry so we ordered a thing of yakisoba.. I got my usual pumpkin & onion skewers, a gyoza soup and shared okonomiyaki with Mei. The last two didn't make it to photos because we devoured the mess out of that crap.

And obligatory camwhoring when I got home~ 

Even though it was a tiny bit of time, I enjoyed meeting Gigi and I hope she comes back to the city soon!

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

This song's been in my head for the past couple hours and I just wanted to share. ♥

Slakah the Beatchild is one of my favorite artists to date. I'm constantly moving to his tracks, whether it be his own solo stuff, or one of his group acts (e.x. Slakadeliqs, Art of Fresh). Everything this man comes out with is full of life energy.

Monday, March 25, 2013

Ageha Makeup Book pre-order~

The moment I saw this on Tumblr, I knew I HAD to get it.

This is Ageha's "Perfect Eye Makeup Book" that was released in Japan on March 16th. An all-over Ageha special (meaning that it's not only Koakuma-Ageha, but Ane-Ageha as well) that focuses on finding your perfect eye makeup look. According to the modelpress press release, it will also include advice on things like dark circles/droopy eye bags, an actual eye chart, etc.

I'm curious about the content speaking that Ageha already goes pretty in-depth with their style tutorials, now it's like 'what more can you say???' but I'm excited to get this regardless.

People are hoping and praying for scans to go online but honestly you might as well get your own hardcopy! As far as I know, Kinokuniya does special orders for non-local residents and will ship items out to you. When I submitted my order request, they told me that the cost would estimate to around 11-12 dollars which is not bad at all, and while shipping costs will determine the final price, I doubt the book will be over 20 dollars... I wonder how much cheaper it would be to get magazines mail-ordered through them, vs. buying them from places like CD Japan.

People are calling this a 'mook' but I think it's an actual book. The Kino's rep had a bit of a hard time finding information on the book, and said that it was listed under books instead of magazines... if it was a magazine special like EGG's Beauty mag, it would be under the same section as their monthly's and their kimono specials. But either way, I am looking forward to this purchase~

Saturday, March 23, 2013

FromJapan Shopping Service Review!

Sometime when I got back from my mission trip, I decided to make the first Japanese purchase in a long while, and right now I just want to share with you guys my experience with one of my new shopping services.

From Japan -- (http://www.fromjapan.co.jp) apparently started in 2004, though I never heard about it until a few months ago! They are an established, registered business, not a personal shopping service, e.x. old services like Mai Ozawa and Mukunoki and people. So while they don't do any in-store visits, they work with online shops and auction sites. Rakuten, mbok.jp, Yahoo! Japan Auctions, and many more sites...

What initially attracted this service to me and my friends were their cheap service fees. Very cheap.
Each item I've ever bidded on only costed a 200 yen fee per item-- I think for more expensive items it -might- cost more, but no more than like 800 yen. Depending on the cost of the items you buy, that's much cheaper than the typical 15-20% commission fee. Now that the yen's value vs. the U.S. Dollar has dropped (Thank God), it feels better to buy and bid to my heart's content (and according to what I have in my wallet, of course).

They have other fees that may rack up (5% processing fee when you try to pull money from your Paypal, etc.) but again, to me that's nothing.

So my first order I decided to bid on a very cute item on mbok~ a Baby, the Stars Shine Bright jumperskirt set from the Osaka BTSSB store!

Back detail

It's sooo adorable. I've been wanting to get plaid for the longest time and when I saw this for only 5,000 yen, I swooped in and got it. The fabric is lightweight but perfect for spring and fall, and nice and soft. I found that the overall-part was detachable, so I could alternate between an overall JSK and a skirt, and it also came with matching hair ties! You know I was happy as hell!

The fees might've been around 900-1000 yen, both for their commission fee, and then they also had a system usage fee for bidding on mbok.

And I also got three old issues of 小悪魔Ageha~ November and December 2007, and December 2006. If you don't know me by now, I am a serious fiend for Ageha magazine and I have a pretty huge collection so far~ so I decided to start collecting a lot of the -old- issues from before I got into gal, and the back issues I had missed over the years. I managed to get each mag off Y!J for 50 yen each, so after fees they were like 250 each~ and two from the same seller so I believe I saved on shipping because of that o:


FJ charges for everything in two payments-- Payment 1 is for the cost of the item + the 'system usage' fee which applies to sites other than Y!J, I believe?... and then there's payment 2, which is for all the shipping fees,domestic and international, and bank transfer fees..

So this is how everything was calculated for the BTSSB JSK, as an example..

Product 1
Item name : BTSSB plaid jsk           AuctionID / OrderID: 548981V

Payment option: Deposit (as in, their system where you have to deposit money onto their site to bid and buy.)
① Final winning price:  5,500 Yen (this was incorrect, they later refunded me 500 yen realizing that error~)
② Commission fee:   200 円
③ Used Point(s):   0 Point   (you gain points to spend, from surveys, their fb promo events, referral system, bidding, etc)
④ System usage fee ( ( ① + ② - ③ ) × 5% ):  285 Yen

Charge1 Total ( ① + ② - ③ + ④ ):  5,985 Yen


( The fees below will be charged at charge 2 payment )
⑤ Domestic delivery charge:   390 Yen
⑥ Bank transfer fee:  178 Yen
⑦ Pending system usage fee of Charge1:   0 Yen
⑧ Excess charge:  0 Yen
⑨ Tax:  0 Yen

And then for the actual international shipping charges for everything...


Payment option:      PayPal
① Domestic delivery charge:   830 Yen
② Bank transfer fee:   514 Yen
③ Pending system usage fee of Charge1:     0 Yen
④ Excess charge:    0 Yen
⑤ Tax ( Charge1 ):    0 Yen
⑥ Surcharge:     0 Yen
⑦ Oversea shipping:    5,400 Yen
⑧ Insurance options:    Not insured
⑨ Total ( ① ~ ⑧ ):      6,744 Yen
⑩ Used Point(s):      40 Points
⑪ System usage fee ( ( ⑨ - ⑩ ) × 5% ):    335 Yen
Charge2 Total ( ⑨ - ⑩ + ⑪ ):     7,039 Yen

lololo I hope that didn't sound too complicated... you can read more on their system on their website, here.

So overall, my experience!

Communication: 10/10. They're pretty good with keeping in contact and answering your questions~ They usually answer within 24 hours, with the exceptions of I think maybe weekends? But either way every question they answered promptly, they were very well-spoken and courteous. Their system will send you automatic confirmations of your deposit actions, refunds, changes in bids/purchases, when they arrive at their warehouse, etc. I highly doubt there will ever be a time you'll really question where your things are at.

Pricing: 7/10. While their system seems pretty complicated at first, it's not really something I try to worry my head over. You just pay the 200 commission fee, the item cost, and if there's a system usage fee, then that, and then unless you need your items in a rush, you don't worry about the Charge 2/Shipping payments until like a month later.

The only thing that bothers me though, is how they deal with Charge 2 payment. I may be spoiled from personal shopping services hoarding my goods for months at a time, but when the Charge 2 payment is requested, they only give you -a week- to pay for it. Otherwise they will supposedly 'drop your order' entirely and probably not give you a refund in the process. I'm bothered when shopping services act like that, because first off, the item is FULLY PAID FOR, -AND- you've already paid their commission fee! I don't think it's fair at all to threaten to drop people's orders because they're not able to pay for shipping within 7 days... at least give them an option for a down payment or something.

With this particular order, it was a hassle for me after giving them the money because I didn't expect shipping to be that much, and I was sort of struggling afterwards, it being around bill-time and whatnot. But as long as you mark your calendar and prepare yourself to pay for the Charge2 payment, you should be good. That's pretty much how I'm dealing with it this time around.

Shipping: 10/10. The moment you pay for your shipping, it's on it's way out the door. You should get a confirmation within 24 hours with tracking number, and from there it's on it's way! They also give you the option of SAL, Airmail, and Surface, and Fed-Ex if you don't want to pay for EMS. Packaging-wise, my stuff came in a decent-sized box.. everything was wrapped in plastic, and cushioned with newspaper.

That's pretty much it! Aside from my personal feelings concerning the Charge2 payment, I really like this shopping service, and I'm currently using them for yet -another- order, full of cute gal stuff xD So expect a haul post from FromJapan within the next month huehuehue...

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Long-awaited Liz Lisa 2013 Fukubukuro

Back in October or November, I joined in on all the hype over the 2013 New Year's lucky pack season. I wanted EVERYTHING from EVERY BRAND and looking at Shibuya 109's online pre-sales and the brand sites I was freaking out everywhere.

Despite lucky packs being super cheap compared to the amount of stuff inside, they always turn out super expensive, especially when you're trying to import-- so I knew that in reality, I couldn't get too much.

Baby, the Stars Shine Bright's lucky packs this year was super expensive, and honestly it discouraged me because their cheapest was like 200 USD. :/ I started the whole "well back in MY DAY they had affordable little basic lucky packs for 70-150 bucks and blahblahblah" in my head. Angelic Pretty was alright, but I wasn't too interested in what they had (or matching basically everyone in my community). Innocent World was tempting... but I wanted to try and break away from getting lolita all the time, so I looked at more gal-type stuff. As far as pre-sales, MARS, La Pafait, D.I.A. was already sold out a looong time ago. It was pretty disappointing. But Liz Lisa was still there...

At the end of the day I ended up getting a Liz Lisa fukubukuro! I had my bby Yuuki snatch one for me from the actual store, since the store and the online shop was a bit different (the online store had plain white bags, meanwhile the in-store had pink floral print bags..) As tempted as I was with the luggage pack, which was so adorable, I ended up getting the big ribbon tote bag. Really, when it comes to Liz Lisa, I only go for the bags themselves. Liz Lisa's sizing is a bit eh for me and I never expect to fit into their clothing.. I wanted to go for D.I.A., or La Pafait, but since Yuuki was running a service for mostly lolita items, I doubted that he'd get one of those in time before they sold out...

Overall my lucky pack was like $175ish after Yuuki's fees, which isn't too bad. I can't imagine how much it would have been for the luggage pack xD

But my God the shipping...? The shipping would've been around 80 dollars which was INSANE. So my lucky pack was sitting in his room for the longest time because I never got around to pay for it. But luckily one of our friends was going to Japan to visit! And somehow, by the grace of God, I was able to evade that crappy shipping price altogether xD Thank you Rei for smuggling my lucky pack into the states..

But anyways, on to the pictures...

Unimaginable feels taking place LOL

In this image, you can really see the size of this bag. It's actually -larger- than my Victoria's Secet tote bag that I always carry around... completely stuffed, it's actually bigger than my whole upper body, both length and width-wise. Crazy.

The mound of stuff I got! The main colors being natural whites, browns and pink, as most of Liz Lisa's stuff are nowadays.

The coat that I received-- it's a nice fuzzy coat. It actually fits me (length-wise.. of course my breasts would forbid it to close), but I'm not planning to keep it~ if you're interested in purchasing, look for my next post!
Original price: ¥ 16, 590


Left's neckline detail~

Two -really- cute tops~ both of them made of this soft, knitted material, one more of an off-white color, the other a tint or so darker. The sheer necklines are really cute (though a bit annoying because of bra-straps showing and stuff!), and perfect now that spring is finally coming along to New York City--
Original Prices: ¥ 7,245 & ¥ 6,195

This dress... is a bit of a sad irony. It was so beautiful, the fabric soft and light and flowy ; w;
This absolutely blew my mind. The dress even has a elastic waist band that gives you a LOT of space... but the bust area is just like 'nope lol'. It gave me the serious 'grandma boobs' because my rack had no place to go but down.. it was really depressing ; w;

Collar detail

With any Japanese brand stuff, it's usually always the dresses that fit, and the tops and everything ill-fitting, but with Liz Lisa, it's the complete opposite. So all my tops, and even the skirt I received fit me... but the dress doesn't. I am disappoint.
Luckily, a friend bought it off of me ; u; so now it has a good home.
Original price: ¥9,345

I'm... blown that I can get this skirt on. And it's actually comfortable.
It's pretty cute! At first I was worried that the cut and stuff would look really bad on me, but it actually rest nicely on my hips. Of course it's a bit on the short side, but that's nothing that shorts can't fix~
Original Price: ¥ 7,245

And finally, the little makeup? pouch? It's nice and soft but it the design doesn't really make sense to me. I don't know, the whole fur with frill kind of throws me off xD And I already have enough pouches and makeup bags to last me the rest of my youth...
Original Price: ¥4,095

So the lucky pack was like what, ¥12,500 (a little over 130USD)?
While the value of the things in this bag came out to ¥50, 715!
That's over 530 USD! And not even including the possible value of the lucky pack tote!


Even though I wasn't able to fit absolutely -everything-, nor am I planning to keep all of it, I'm so glad I got this lucky pack ; u; It's just.. AHHHHHHHH
Friday, March 15, 2013
My neighborhood is now under martial law as of last night. Media is not allowed to get within this area, and everyone's constitutional rights are basically ignored completely.


Thursday, March 14, 2013


Coming home this past Saturday I noticed there was an odd amount of NYPD vehicles in my neighborhood, near the street that I live on. Usually when you see things like that, you assume that maybe they're doing some sort of drug bust, or someone had a domestic issue or whatever. I dismissed the thought and went home.

However, the next day I go on Tumblr and I find these posts:



Tension is building in my neighborhood.

A young 16-year-old kid was shot 7 to 11 times by two police officers this past Saturday. The reports still unclear but the police are claiming that he had a weapon. Other witnesses said he didn't. Overall he was well known to be a generally good kid, not into gangs or anything like that, and he was shot dead.

Sunday when I saw the NYPD, I found out through these articles that the reason for the police presence was because the police tried to interrupt a candlelight vigil for the young kid, and the moment the people started talking about protesting, immediately the police got backup in riot gear to intimidate them. Mind you, as far as what is being said, no one escalated the argument to the point of actual fighting.

Since then, there's apparently been protests down the street every evening, demanding answers. Tonight was the worst night of them all.

I'm on the bus on my way home, and the moment I hit Church Ave, you just see hell. It seriously looks like someone called for a bomb threat. NYPD vans.. motorcyclists... helicopters... so many riot gear men... the media is FINALLY THERE, and then even the police commissioner. Doing nothing but intimidating the people and trying to get them to back down.

Instead of answering the people, or the mother of the young boy who was murdered, they're doing this...

The fact that this is escalating, and it's so close to home is getting me worried. I'm afraid that one of these days all hell is going to break loose midday, blocking off my chances of getting to work... or myself or someone like my cousin getting caught in the crossfire, either getting hurt or getting arrested for no reason...

There's a serious flaw in the New York City Police Department. The sad thing is that this whole area can protest, and cause such a stir, but at the end of the day, instead of this being about a boy being wrongfully killed (remember Trayvon Martin last year?), media is going to record this as "the x time the uppity nigs are freaking out". The people who took an oath to protect the people of this city are instead openly acting racist, misogynistic, killing and persecuting people based on looks, raping women and covering up their tracks... Unless something huge happens, that ends up usurping the police commissioner or other people in charge of the city (which of course would involve extreme violence, one way or another, one side or another..), this system of things will not change at all.

I just pray that boy rests in peace...

KumaCrafts purchase...

Last month I caved in when I shouldn't have, and purchased a henshin necklace from KumaCrafts. They're a much-talked about shop that sells laser-cut jewelry and stuff. Their most popular items are Sailor Moon jewelry, like the sailor scouts' henshin and compact necklaces...

I was craving a Sailor Venus one for the longest time, since she's one of my senshi other than Sailor Moon, so I succumbed and bought one!

But when I received it, I wasn't really satisfied with the product... at all. The moment I wanted to return it, I found that KumaCrafts didn't accept any returns except for damaged products... like really?

This is the stock photo for the Venus henshin necklace...

and these are my photos:

Granted, one thing I'll blame myself for was the fact that I didn't really pay attention to the actual measurements of the product. It is so tiny! I expected it to be a little bigger but didn't think about actually making that measurement and figuring out if I wanted it or not..

Even with the size, I would've accepted it, had I not felt that the store pictures just serve to flatter the product extremely well, compared to how it looks in real life...

From the way the stock photo looked, it made it seem like the details on the gold layer of the necklace were engraved, and had some sort of 'dimension' to it.. but it's not at all, if anything, it's etched (it's hard for me to tell because I suck). From head-on,  the details of the gold parts are barely noticeable-- it's only from certain sides that it looks like it has the detail like in the photos.

It's unfortunate because some of my friends who bought the Sailor Moon ones were just as disappointed with their own buys... I had one or two question me when I complained about it, trying to tell me that the whole laser-cut process is pretty expensive, but honestly? I would rather pay -more- for a bigger, better looking product, than the money I spent on this small thing :c

I'd say it was a waste of $28... but luckily one of my friends bought it off of me. I don't know if I'd really order from KumaCrafts after that, unless they step it up a notch..



February Purchases~

I barely purchased much during the month of February due to being sick... but I wanted to make a post anyways!

These are the few things I managed to snag during my free time:

March 2013 小悪魔Ageha and September 2012 EGG.

Usually I don't like buying EGG too much, but when I do, it's usually an older issue from one of the warmer months like April-Octoberish... I like their summer issues and the 'transitional' seasons the most, but winter tend to look really bland to me. Even more so, now that a lot of their regular looks are bland compared to earlier years.

This month Ageha was nice, a lot of outfits I'm taking inspiration to, but I'm sort of disliking the amount of photoshop that's being used on Sakurina these days :/ I understand that she's getting old, and she has the good ol' neck rolls and stuff, but for goodness sakes...
and of course, yet another makeup bag freebie that I'll eventually give away...

At some point during the month of February I ended going to the American International Toy Fair, a convention for businesses to trade products and showcase the upcoming toys.

I originally went there to get some San-X Rilakkuma things, like the monster Korilakkuma plush... I originally wanted to go the second-to-last day, but ended up going on the last day... at the very last minute, and missed my chance at it :c 

It could've been so good, too! The plush was only $60!

Despite that, I lurked around and got a bunch of free stuff. Jelly Belly products.. some little My Little Pony trading card pack... two Disney Princess character packs (the smaller one was free~ the bigger one was only 5 dollars!), a 5 foot long stick of green apple bubble gum, and then this cute light-up turtle ; ~; It's really a baby product, but it lights up the ceiling with stars so I use it sometimes when I try to relax and go to sleep xD It's really nice 

I also got more wedding books for reference...
I honestly don't know why I collect these anymore. I feel like I kind of fell out of love with the thought of Event Planning? I figure maybe I just need to challenge myself... I need to push myself and make a portfolio and apply for an internship someone, maybe.

I also tried to give into buying lip makeup products now! Which I did not such a good job at xD
I enjoy Nicka K as a brand, their lipsticks are nice and moisturizing... however all of their things have wayyy too much shimmer in them!

(L->R) Honey Buff, Glorious Pink, Stain Glow, and Power Plum.
I honestly didn't realize how shimmery everything is... it's a bit too much.. I was honestly looking for matte lip stuff this time around so I have no clue how I made a mistake like this xD; Now I need to look for matte sticks to go with these!

I also recently received a package from FromJapan, a Japanese shopping service, so I hope to make a review about my experience with them soon..
I hope to make a video soon~ work is becoming more tedious as people are dropping out the job like flies, and the work period is almost up.. and with Spring Break for public school kids and the last week approaching, my job is gonna get pretty crazy @ w@ I hope I can survive these last few weeks!

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Kyary Pamyu Pamyu Concert

Forgot to show another birthday present to myself!

Guess who I'll be seeing April 14th ~

Monday, March 11, 2013

Gave me ridiculous feels.


So I had mentioned multiple times everywhere that I was suffering from this fluid in my chest. I was suffering from it for a total of 2 months, I think?

It was a really terrible experience. I'm so used to being healthy or just having a flu or a cold or something, but when it comes time that things are keeping me from breathing, eating and drinking right, and sleeping, it becomes a world of problems for me. I start freaking out way too hard.

It started out as bronchitis, which I'm sure I got from some retarded tourist who coughed -into the air- at my workplace. Didn't even cover his mouth or anything, I was able to literally see the spray coming from his mouth. Days later I started with a bad cough that lasted for weeks. When it got to the point where my chest was feeling weird, and I couldn't even breathe as I slept, I went to the ER. Not once, but twice. The first time they diagnosed it correctly, but said 'it wasn't that bad' and gave me antibiotics just in case after doing x-rays and whatnot.

While the coughing stopped, the breathing wasn't getting any better. I was barely getting sleep because I would constantly wake up from not being able to breathe. It didn't matter what position I was in while I slept-- on my back, on my side, and even when I was sitting up in a subway car, I would suddenly have this 'attack' where for a good few seconds I wouldn't be able to breathe. Especially when it snowed one weekend in February. When I went to the ER a second time, the doctor brushed me off and said I just had a 'heartburn', even though I know what acid reflux feels like. At that point I was angry and I just refused to go back, I basically came to the point where they wouldn't try to listen or help me until I was damn near dying.

I had a few more attacks when I was out and about, usually hanging out with my pastor after work, or at the church, and he was literally there every time I suddenly couldn't breathe. He was very concerned and it felt good to know that I wasn't being treated like I was crazy or I didn't know what I was talking about. There was one last time, where I went to work, feeling fine at first in the morning, but the moment I start being on the clock, I couldn't breathe. I was struggling to get enough breath for 2-3 hours before the feeling went away again. That's when I decided to walk-in to my regular physician to see what she had to say.

Of course, I didn't end up seeing her that day :/ It ended up being a really busy day and I was only seen by random nurses and some Indian doctor, all of them trying to tell me how I felt, trying to tell me one thing or another even though I tried to be as detailed as I could. "You don't have -fluid- in your chest, when you do, it feels like you're actually drowning". Like are you serious? I can't sleep at night because I'm constantly 'drowning' over some sort of fluid substance that keeps trying to come up out of my chest. The doctor I ended up seeing said that I 'probably' had seasonal allergies that affected me in the winter... which makes no sense to me. Suggested I take Claritin. Really?

At that moment I just felt like no one in the medical field really cared about shit-else but themselves, telling people their conditions aren't 'that bad' and telling them 'to come back if it gets worse'. One ER visit, there was a man who was having heart troubles, literally in a wheelchair, having clear trouble breathing, sounding like he was choking or about to vomit, and he ended up waiting there for a good 1 1/2 hours since I was there, so I know he had to have been there for LONGER than I have, and they were barely paying attention to him or calling him in until his girlfriend was damn near about to curse them all out. Even now, I think most of them should just burn their degrees and quit their careers.

It was a situation that made me pretty emotional. I could barely sleep the entire month of February, and it affected my stamina so badly that I was having problems with my attendance at work, as well as actually being on the job. How could I serve people, talk with customers, give them a smile when my chest was constantly hurting, or because my body was barely getting as much oxygen as usual? I remember at some point I had called my pastor at his job (his wife's phone was off, so I couldn't get through to her) and I pretty much started crying to him. I knew that I was taking up his time, he probably had a meeting, etc, but he made me feel so much better. He treated me like his own child and calmed me. Everyone but the professionals saw how my condition for what it was, and how it was affecting me.

I ended up booking a REAL appointment so I could see my REAL doctor. I was getting really tired of the bullcrap. But before I was even able to see her, I was healed.

For 3 weeks, after the second ER visit, I kept steaming myself, applying Vicks to my chest (even though it breaks me out), gurgling with salt water, tea, ginger, every home remedy I could find and nothing helped this gunk in my chest come out. It felt like something cold sitting at the bottom of my lungs, some stubborn mucus refusing to come out. Nothing worked.

But somehow, last Sunday I went up for prayer at altar call and God just worked his ways on my body. I didn't go up there for healing-- I was actually thinking of other friends who needed deliverance, but God made it to be another way. The visiting pastor prayed for "divine intervention" over me and within a few minutes, as I was praying, a huge glob God knows what came up from my chest. I knew from that moment, it was over. It was a done deal. There was a strange burning feeling throughout my throat and my nose, almost as if something was clearing that whole area, and a few minutes later I felt like I couldn't breathe again. All the gunk that was sitting at the bottom of my chest was coming up and I pretty much sat there and barfed everything up. It was a weirdly amazing experience, part of the reason being because I -never- throw up, I've always had a pretty iron stomach, but everything I felt at that moment was something other than myself just cleaning out my system.

Needless to say, I'm barely having any problems since then. My stamina's sort of back, I've been able to sleep, no chest pains, no feelings of weirdness of anything in my chest.. I'm still having a bit of phlegm but I've been taking 500mg of Vitamin C twice a day and that clears all of that up. I've always been cancelling out on yoga dates and stuff with my friends like Mei and people because I was never feeling even 70% well, but now I feel so good that I want to start easing myself into the whole fitness thing again.

Even my boss have been dropping hints about yoga and how it's good for expanding the lung capacity and stuff, telling me this 'because he wants me to be healthy and smiling again', LOL which is code for "I need you to get better so I can have you do more hours and be more productive" so I think I'll be taking yoga up again lolol.

But I'm just so glad and joyous to know my God is a healer in my life, whether or not you believe in it. I believe that He will continue to keep my health and my life in order and that he'll do so much more for me in the future..
Friday, March 1, 2013

Our Kawaii.i Episode~

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